The Role of the CASA Advocate is One of Patience

Hank greets everyone with a big, welcoming smile and friendly blue eyes. His presence is comforting, and that is especially important because Hank is a CASA for Children advocate who speaks on behalf of children living in the foster care system.

Children living in foster care have experienced traumatizing abuse or neglect. A comforting, consistent, caring adult, like Hank with a bright smile and a big heart, is just what these children need at what could be the saddest time of their young lives.

When you listen to CASA Hank talk about the two girls, ages five and seven, and their nine-year-old brother who he advocates for, you hear how much he genuinely cares about their welfare.


You can hear the excitement in Hank’s voice when he talks about the boy, who we will call Jack, and all the potential he sees in him. The first time Hank met Jack at his school, Hank says, “He met me with a big grin and immediately interacted with me. It was a very gratifying experience.”

Hank and Jack formed their first connection over baseball, discussing the great Hank Aaron during one of his visits. On the next visit Hank says, “This little boy was so excited to tell me all about how Hank Aaron broke Babe Ruth’s home run record.” On the next visit Jack is “telling me all about Jackie Robinson and Martin Luther King. He is such an impressive and engaging little boy. We can only hope the system we have can do right by him,” said Hank.

Jack’s two little sisters, who we will call Molly and Kristen, have also touched Hank’s heart. They live in a different foster placement from their brother, as often happens when multiple siblings are removed from their home.

In spite of the trauma the younger Molly has experienced, “she is still a typical five-year-old, excited as she runs to show me her latest craft or coloring project,” said Hank. However, Hank’s eyes sadden a bit when he recounts a conversation with seven-year-old Kristen. “When I asked her if there was anything she wanted me to tell the judge, she answered, ‘Tell the judge that I don’t want to be a foster kid anymore, tell him I want to go home,’” Hank said.

While Hank stays focused on the children, the case still involves the adults as well, including foster, biological, and adoptive parents. The challenges facing many of the adults in the children’s lives sometimes compound the trauma that the children have already experienced – their mom disappears for two months, then returns; their dad is not initially in the picture; the foster parents were not interested in adoption, and then later wanted to adopt. It is easy to see how the children’s voices can get lost in the process. Even when Hank was certain that the children were finally going to realize their “forever adoptive home,” the case took a different path as the children’s father, now in a stable home and relationship, stepped in to bring his children home.

When Hank met them at their family court hearing, he could not help but notice a close and affectionate relationship between dad and son. You could see that “Jack was proud of his dad,” said Hank.

For Hank, because regardless of each family circumstance, “As a CASA,” Hank says, “even though I may be conflicted at times…I give the court my observations and let the judge take it from there. In this case, there is a dad who loves his kids and the kids want to go home.”

Hank’s role as a CASA has changed his view of the child welfare system. It has also been both a spiritual and analytical journey for him. After years as a member of a hospital board, “It was time for me to have more personal contact. I wanted to be a positive person (making a difference) on an individual level,” Hank said.

CASA advocates bring so many skills and personality traits to their role. As Hank spoke about his case, it was easy to see how important every one of these traits are to be CASA. For Hank, he will continue to advocate for the best interest of Jack, Molly and Kristen…watching over them, hopeful that their journey will have a happy ending – that is what being a CASA is all about: making a difference, one child at a time. @CASA4Children


An Aunt’s Wise Words Inspired Trish to Become a Foster and Adoptive Parent

Trish always knew she wanted to adopt a child one day, but she was hesitant to become a foster parent at first. “I was terrified of falling in love with the child and then having them leave, especially if they left to a situation that wasn’t ideal,” she explained.

It is her aunt’s powerful words that led Trish to change her mind. Ten years ago, Trish’s 17-year-old cousin lost his life to cancer. After his death, his mother—Trish’s aunt—told her, “I had 17 years with my son. And I loved all that time that I had with him, and I would never sacrifice that to spare me the pain of losing him. You can’t not bring someone into your life for fear that you might lose them.”

Trish had not thought of it like that, and these words truly changed her outlook about becoming a foster parent. From there, she and her husband thought, “We have to go for it.”

Six years ago, Trish and her husband finally had this opportunity. The couple took in three sisters who were removed from their home due to suspicion of parental drug use and possible neglect. The sisters were 11, seven, and six years old when they were removed from their home, and they were placed with Trish and her husband shortly after.

The girls were struggling with many emotional problems. Their CASA volunteer, Clare McCarroll, observed that Erin, seven, seemed very angry and would frequently have meltdowns, while Maddie, six, appeared very nervous and clingy, often bursting into tears. Clare noted that a therapist helped Erin and Maddie ease their anxieties and better learn how to verbalize their needs. Lauren, the eldest sister, was also struggling emotionally and was upset about her mother not being there for her. She ultimately chose to live in a youth shelter, but Trish and her husband have always invited her into their home each week because they feel it is important for the girls to maintain a sibling relationship.

About year after taking in the sisters, Trish and her husband took in another foster child, Sally, who is the siblings’ niece. Sally, who was born premature, was six months old and weighed 10 pounds when she arrived at the couple’s home. Sally’s biological mother, age 20, was unemployed, habitually smoked marijuana, and had postpartum depression and untreated bi-polar disorder. She had truly neglected Sally; she routinely fed her diluted whole milk instead of baby formula, never treated Sally’s diaper rash, and had her sleep on a dirty mattress on the floor because her own belongings took over the baby’s crib. The biological father, also 20, struggled with substance abuse.

“When they brought Sally to me, I felt like she bonded with me immediately,” Trish said. She held a birthday party that night for one of her foster daughters and invited extended family. “Sally would watch me as I walked around house. She was so hungry, sucking down bottles. It was an immediate connection, I felt.”

CASA volunteer Robie McKinnon, who was assigned to Sally’s case, noted how much improvement Sally made with Trish and her husband. After just two months, Sally had already gained seven pounds, and her pediatrician said she was now at a healthy weight for her age group. She continued to reach appropriate developmental milestones during her time with them.

While there was a great connection between them, Trish said it was difficult at the same time. “I felt so connected and I was afraid that if she ever left… I didn’t want her to have that feeling that I didn’t care about her because I knew she wouldn’t understand why she left… She is just pure joy. I can’t imagine my life without her. She’s so precious.”

Sally came into Trish’s life at a time when she truly needed to be taken care of. However, it was more complex with Erin and Maddie because they were older and more aware when they came into her care. “They always thought they were going back [with their mother],” Trish said of their demeanor when they first came to live with her. “Their mom would make DYFS out to be wrong, and she put herself in the role of the victim, and the kids bought into that. This made it difficult for them to adapt.”

Three months after the sisters were brought into the couple’s home, CASA Clare observed great improvement. The family even went on a trip to Disney World together. Erin and Maddie expressed their desire to be adopted by Trish and her husband, and the couple was eager to adopt the sisters as well.

The day finally came when Erin and Maddie had to say goodbye to their mother, and a final meeting was scheduled. However, it was a very stressful day; their mother never showed up.

“[Their mother] kept saying she was late but on her way, but it went on to be three hours late,” Trish said. “Finally, I said, this is done. Their mom had no intention of saying goodbye to them. We had so much nervous tension bound up because the kids were afraid to see [their mother] and say goodbye. And they were wondering how she could not come say goodbye.”

Trish had an idea to ease the tension. When the goodbye meeting was called off, Trish resorted to music. She put on Pat Benatar’s “We Belong.”

“‘I said, ‘This is our song, girls.’ And we ran around house. I’ve never in my life had that much tension. I could have ran a marathon… And this morning, that song came on! Every time I hear it, I cry.”

When the girls finally accepted that their mother was not coming for them, Trish said it became a lot easier for them; they had a final answer. Trish commended their therapist, who she said was wonderful and helped them so much through the process.

Sally was adopted by Trish and her husband about a year after her aunts. CASA Robie said she was thrilled with the couple and was happy that they were planning to adopt Sally. She still sees Sally from time to time because the family keeps in touch. “She’s the brightest, most adorable little girl, and happy and a lot of fun. We have tea parties when we get together,” she said of Sally, who is now five.

“We’re a family, and families kind of morph and change and grow,” Trish said. “Especially these days; remarriages, divorce, step children. And I think that [adopting from foster care] doesn’t have to be an extraordinary situation. We’re just a normal family now.”